Flaccid pizza, burny bits and Argos

Monday the 14th of May 2018 Well as far as Monday's go, it's not been too shabby. Eli reverted back to normal form and woke up at about five much to everyone's delight but he was at least able to tick over on his own till about half past, which was the same time Bear … Continue reading Flaccid pizza, burny bits and Argos

Reflection, scones and fat fighting fails

Monday the 7th of May - BANK HOLIDAY HOOORAYYYYYY Yesterday was really good for me you know, it made me feel all fuzzy in the emotion box. I did nothing out of the ordinary, it was what most people would call a relaxed easy day, but it lifted me more than I think I can … Continue reading Reflection, scones and fat fighting fails

Less lard, solo parenting and soft play

Ahhhhhhhhhh Monday you big pile of shite; I had accepted you'd be coming but I can't say I was chuffed to see you. You'd think not having to work a Monday, and being off sick anyway that I'd be more ambivalent toward the start of the week but I've a deep rooted hatred of it. … Continue reading Less lard, solo parenting and soft play

Twinnies, tantrums and Mondays

Boom! Monday's almost done - I've survived! Hooo-fucking-ray! I've got to be honest, the day didn't get off to a promising start because Eli was being a massive pain in the arse but it's been alright really. I've not set the world alight by discovering a cure for tiny penis syndrome or helped a granny … Continue reading Twinnies, tantrums and Mondays

Payback, shit storm and InstaFAIL

Well.... it got me. Payback out played me. It couldn't even wait until tomorrow when Eli was at nursery the unreasonable bastard. I knew yesterday that'd I'd done too much, I knew I'd pay but I didn't bank on it coming so soon or so hard to be honest.... I was cocky. I should have … Continue reading Payback, shit storm and InstaFAIL

Monday, Maths and M.E.

Well I'm alive so the good, or bad news, depending on how you look at it is that Monday didn't kill me. So firstly FUCK YOU MONDAY. Thankfully bollockchops slept through last night and there were no more spew related incidents, he has however, woken up in one of the whiniest fucking moods known to … Continue reading Monday, Maths and M.E.

Skidmarks, milestones and networking

Mondays aren't for me really. The weekend's gone and I give not one fuck about the "new chapter" of Monday. For people who work it's the beginning of a week of dealing with the shenanigans of others, for people who don't and want to its a reminder that life has kicked them in the chops, and … Continue reading Skidmarks, milestones and networking

Burger Friday, Davie and Agnes, and shame

So first things first. As someone who is metabolically challenged (fat) and doing fat club I CRAVE meals that remind me of the hedonistic days of eating out and drinking lager... like burger and chips. I have a very complex relationship with burgers; I'm not a big fan of meat (titter) so technically I should … Continue reading Burger Friday, Davie and Agnes, and shame

More faces than a royal flush….

Today's been a right odd day... and the funny thing is, that those around me probably haven't even realised that I wasn't on form. That's the thing about this - you can't always SEE it. I woke up today, and yesterday for that matter, feeling shit. Really shit. I don't really want to labour on … Continue reading More faces than a royal flush….

The joy of bed… and bread

I tell you what whoever said there was was NOTHING like your own bed wasn't lying. After almost a week sleeping on Christiaan's folks spare bed I would have punched a granny for a decent nights sleep. The irony of it all, is that its Christiaan's old bed from when he lived in his own … Continue reading The joy of bed… and bread

Can’t stop M.E. now…. ahmm having such a good time, ahmm tickling your balllssss!

Be gone bellies! I imagine that losing weight with M.E. is a bit like trying to have sex with a flacid knob. You have the right equipment but the bastarding fucking thing just will NOT work. I have legs, arms etc, just like you (well maybe not you) but I can't exercise like you. I … Continue reading Can’t stop M.E. now…. ahmm having such a good time, ahmm tickling your balllssss!