Friday the 13th of July 2018 Fuck me, I hadn't realised until I typed the date out that it was actually Friday the 13th. Well I fucking never. I mean, Jason V hasn't even text far less shown up? Eeeesht he's changed. I guess given the fact I'm half way through the day and I've … Continue reading Friday the 13th, CBD hopes and family time ❤️👨👩👦
Thursday the 12th of July 2018 *Tut* 4 days. That's how long I've been gone.....4 fucking days, and look what you've done to the place! BoJo's all Eye of the Tiger about kicking Terrahawk May to the curb, the footballists taxi for "home" got lost and is now en-route to Croatia and Trump's coming to … Continue reading Caution: Contains themes of arseholery and rantage (again)
Sunday the 8th of July 2018 Blimey, it's scorchio out there. Well for here anyway, it's 26 degrees. All of the men in the village have been raped of their shirts and as a result I've seen enough pale blue legs and big flabby moobs to last me a life time. Scottish blokes are not … Continue reading Scorchio, camel cock pie and .. scenery
Friday the 6th of July 2018 Well fuck me.... what a week. Seriously, I know I've said that before but just wait till I tell you what's been going on. Tuesday was the last blog update... fucking Tuesday and I thought that the next time I flipped the laptop open read to write I'd be … Continue reading A very bad trip…..
Tuesday the 3rd of July 2018 Thank fuck, I made it, it's the end of Tuesday... it's taken AGES to arrive. It's been an utterly strange and depressing few days, so I'll apologise now because I suspect this will be all over the place. In some ways I've made headway in treatment, but I've taken … Continue reading Bigger Boy Pills, Jekyll and Hyde and sunshine 🌞
Sunday the 1st of July 2018 The 1st of July? How the actual fuck has that happened? I remember writing the blog post for the 1st of June and thinking "aye this'll be it, the month that it all turns around", June can't be as bad as May was and in some ways I wasn't … Continue reading Swings, Roundabouts and…. lock jaw
Thursday the 28th June 2018 Blimey, Thursday already and it's an absolute belter out there. I was sat out in the garden for a bit earlier this morning but it got way too hot and rather than having a lovely warming heat on my bones I felt my bone marrow was on actual fire so … Continue reading Boudoirs, ugly genitals and burny hot
Tuesday the 26th of June 2018 I'll level with you - I nearly didn't write again today. Don't get me wrong, I love writing but it kind of feels like a pressure some days; a pressure I've added to life purely through choice I might add. I've gotten used to opening the laptop, or the … Continue reading Friends, haircuts and no fucking chair!
Sunday the 24th of June 2018 - HAPPY BIRTHDAY D! Well, what a thoroughly fucking lovely weekend I've had. OK you funny fucker, pick yourself up the floor, I know you weren't expecting that but I'm not always a miserable twat. Honestly, I've had a right nice couple of days with our Christiaan and Eli … Continue reading Glorious❤️
Friday the 22nd of June 2018 Right then, we all made it to Friday hooooray, well done etc etc! Now, I don't want to completely destroy the equilibrium of the universe, but there will be no burgers today. Well no porky bastards anyway. Yes, I know it's fucking Friday, I just said that, but I'm … Continue reading Orange Walks, Epsom Salt and fucking with Burger Friday
Thursday the 21st of June 2018 All those in favour of renaming the blog "Not doing very much at all really" raise your hands now. 🙋♀️🙋♂️🤷♀️🤦♀️ That is, if it doesn't knacker you - blink if that's easier. Not too much mind, or you'll look special and not in a good way. I tell you what, I'm … Continue reading Doing nothing, debates and very shameful rides
Tuesday the 19th of June 2018 Well bugger me backwards and call me Phyllis, I've made it back again. That's two days on the trot people - I'll soon be kicking JK Rowling in the arse as I'm passing her by. Harry Potter my fucking arse, get a real job. So, it's Tuesday, the day … Continue reading Toddlers, Carpets and not faking it.
Monday the 18th of June 2018 It's been 4 days since I've been able to put words in the right order. Can you believe it? 4 fucking days. That's why I've not been around much. I could talk for the most part, but my brain was so tired I wasn't capable of writing a sentence … Continue reading Went a bit AWOL didn’t I?
Thursday the 14th June 2018 Fuck me it's windy out there, like REALLY windy. We've had a few casualties in the garden; the wee plasticky greenhouse that I've no long since bought and planted up with pride blew like a leaf across the garden earlier; twice. It slammed against the garage wall with a right … Continue reading Windy broken bits
Wednesday the 13th of June 2018 I'm sat in my very quiet serene lounge and to be honest I was enjoying the peace until i rI realised that I could hear birds shouting at each other. No, it's not delicate wee tweets, it's full blown "HOI MARGARET, GET YER WASHING IN DOLL, THE RAINS ON … Continue reading Fucks Sake Seamus
Tuesday the 12th of June 2018 What a fucking day.....No don't worry, it's not one of THOSE posts. I've caught a bus and THEN flagged a taxi to take me away from the pity party that's dominated me this last wee while. Nah, today I'm undoubtedly fucked, but I'm in good humour so you're safe. … Continue reading OAP grafters and unreasonable goblins
Monday the 11th June 2018 I bunked off yesterday... again... but it's alright, there was no major drama, we were just out enjoying the sunshine in the garden and I chose not to write rather than not being able to write. I think I might need to give myself a bit of a break when it … Continue reading Good Knight/Bad night
Saturday the 9th of June 2018 Firstly, sorry for being a moany fucker yesterday and before you all start trying to make me feel less of a moany fucker by proclaiming "you weren't..HONESTLY... and EVEN if you were it's TOTALLY understandable" - don't. I was. I appreciate you trying to make me feel better about … Continue reading Living for the weekends ❤️
Friday the 8th of June 2018 What a fucking week - I'm battle weary that's for sure. I'm not sure if you were ever a battler at school? I wasn't really; I grew out of my fighting days just as I went into high school (around age 11 for you English lot that don't know … Continue reading Where’s my violin?
Wednesday 6th of June 2018 Well, today is better than yesterday so that's good news innit? I mean I didn't skip out of bed to Katrina and the Waves first thing this morning, but I didn't have to check my own pulse to see if I was still alive either; so that's progress. It was … Continue reading Big Boy Bed, Windows and Morrison’s
Get ready for loads of moaning and swearing... the inevitable has happened.
Monday 4th June 2018 Ahh hello you. Thanks for dropping in and reading, I'm always grateful you take the time. So firstly, yesterday. Nothing bad happened, actually, it was a fine day; it was just busy for me so firstly I didn't get a chance to write all day and secondly, by the time I … Continue reading Life, Cheese and fucking Trolls
Saturday the 2nd of June 2018 I KNEW that June wasn't as much of an arsehole as May was. She couldn't be. Not when she brings with her long days and sunshine and here we are on her second day and you know what? It's been alright! Actually, some bits of it have been really … Continue reading Bouncy pillows of fun, farm shops and dinosaurs
Friday the 1st of June 2018 - IT'S NOT A MOANY ONE HONEST. I think June and I are going to get on alright to be honest. She's come in like a breath of fresh air this morning, kicked May squarely in the flaps and sent her packing. I think she understands what I always … Continue reading June has arrived, May is an arsehole and that’s all there is to it.
Thursday the 31st May 2018 It's been a right odd day to be honest. I'd planned to try and get myself out for an hour this morning having stayed in yesterday but it's not quite worked out like that.... never does does it? I'm SURE someone somewhere hears what I'm planning, snorts and says "aye … Continue reading It’s all gone to shit
Wednesday the 30th of May 2018 It's happening more and more isn't it? Me, missing a day of writing... eeesht, I'm treating this hobby like a holiday camp, swinging in and out when I feel like it. When the going got tough, well, I fucked off didn't I? Sorry, or you're welcome, whichever fits best … Continue reading Own goals, old friends and a bit of self pity
Monday the 28th of May 2018 It's happened. I've become middle aged. I mean, I've known it was coming for a while what with my growing adoration for elasticated clothing and comfy footwear but I thought it would be a slow and graceful evolution rather than what turned out to be a very disappointing wet … Continue reading Pansies, Best friends and more sitting down
Sunday the 27th of May 2018 I tell you what, I'll do well if I manage to get to my normal few thousand words today because I've done literally fuck alllll day. Not because of any overly dramatic reason to be fair, I mean I'm shit but I'm not at deaths door, it's just the … Continue reading A day of rest, family and abortion rights
Saturday the 26th of May 2018 Private Mellars reporting for duty.... aaaaaaaateeeeeeeeenshunnnnnnnnnnnnn etc. etc. Firstly, sorry for missing last night. No, no, relaaaaaax, we weren't meant to be meeting at that seedy bar again, I mean for not writing. Those that follow the Facebook page clearly had an explanation (also sad face pics) but I … Continue reading Joggists, tantrums and a weird bruise….
Thursday the 24th May 2018 This is going to be an weird write up I think because I've just been watching something that's made me feel a bit uncomfortable on Facebook and I'll not be able to get past it until I mentally file it; i.e. write about it. So sorry in advance.... It was … Continue reading “Hunters”, hairdressers and… no hope (not even Bob Hope).
Wednesday the 23rd of May 2018 I'm just going to put it out there; this Yanny/Laurel thing? Bag of shite. I keep seeing it plastered all over Facebook, but I just don't get it. Why is it creating a stir? I can literally tell Christiaan something one day and he'll swear I said something different; … Continue reading Magic, scones and grey fucking hairs
Tuesday the 22nd of May 2018 I'm going to start by having a marvellously British moment in a Scottish kind of way. Ready? What the fuck is going on with the bastard weather? Why is it baltic out there? Not even the fleecy blanket could keep the minus 85394853948563498563498564 wind off me and allow me … Continue reading Independence, haircuts and WHERE THE FUCK IS THE SUNSHINE?
Monday the 21st of May 2018 Right then, here we are again at the beginning of another week and yet again I'm sitting down to write about fuck knows what for fuck knows how long. I wish I could tell you I have an agenda mapped out for content, but I don't and to be … Continue reading Losing control, not giving in and pissed off chairs
Sunday the 20th of May 2018 So, bit quiet last night right? Those of you who follow my Facebook page may have seen me explain I'd not had a great day, but for those of you who don't, well.... there was no blog last night. The world had less in the way of moans and … Continue reading Back like a fart in a spacesuit
Friday the 18th of May 2018 Guess where I am? No, not B & Q.... the other place, with the sunshine and shit. No, not Tenerife, colder than that. Yes, you've got it... Le jardin. Sounds like I've been somewhere different, somewhere more exotic and less boring if you say it in French, which is … Continue reading Down with French Fancies….. and wasps
Thursday the 17th of May 2018 Apparently it's only 10 degree's out here today, but I'm calling bullshit on that because.... CLUB TROPICANA DRINKS ARE FREEEEEE (R.I.P George)....I HAVE TAKEN MY JUMPER OFF! Oh for fucks sake Don't panic, I still have vest thing and my knocker shelf on - the boys are very much … Continue reading Club Tropicana, Cheetara and terrorism… apparently
Wednesday the 16th of May 2018 I've started to write this three times already today and had to delete every draft because it was all over the place so I'll warn you now; tonight's blog is as fluid as a Kim Jog-un versus Donald Trump dance off. Which to be fair, I'd pay to see.... … Continue reading Dance off dreams, Weddings and loads of rants
Vlogging, more of the same and cat shit. A day in the life of your average M.E. riddled mum.
Monday the 14th of May 2018 Well as far as Monday's go, it's not been too shabby. Eli reverted back to normal form and woke up at about five much to everyone's delight but he was at least able to tick over on his own till about half past, which was the same time Bear … Continue reading Flaccid pizza, burny bits and Argos
I tell you what, I bet you were expecting tonight's blog to be FUCK ME TODAY WAS HARD. Well.... oh just read it. #ThisisMe #mecfs #meawarenessuk #mewarrior #silentillness #swearymum